Fractured Fairy Tales: Juniper Snowpea in "Kiss Me"

 

Once upon a time, there was a very disgruntled princess who lived in a big castle in Penn's Woods.
The castle was filled with a rather alarming amount dolls and toys.

 

Although she was very beautiful,

 

With long, golden locks,

 

And she had many clothes, dolls, and toys,

 

Yet ---- she was still very unhappy.

 

One day as she rode upon her mighty steed,

 

A frog entered the castle. "At last!" quoth he; "I have found a princess to rescue me!"

 

He was a prince, cursèd to speak with those pretentious accents above words
such as "cursèd." And by the way, he was also a frog.

 

"Kiss me and the curse shall be broken. "Kiss me and I shall give thee riches.
I shall be thy lord and husband, and I shall take care of thee.
Ye need not ever do anything for yourself again.
 Ye shall bear my royal children, and ye shall be pampered all the rest of your life."

 

The princess thought the frog's legs for dinner that night were especially delicious.

 

The End.

 

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